Thursday, November 30, 2006

Whether to Blog or not to Blog

Whether to blog or not to blog?
Whether it is nobler to air one's dirty laundry or not?
Whether to utter the dirty word; burned out, stressed out, played out, preached out?
Whether to resign oneself to the daily tasks that is one's duty?
Whether to quit blogging at all?

For what is a blog after all but words strung together like a pearl necklace
For what is a blogger but a person who is a wordsmith perhaps not a blacksmith
For what is one's thoughts but free floating words like bubbles blown by a child and then the wind.
For what is one feelings but that which is provoked like when a bee stings or when your heart sings
For what is life but jigsaw puzzle pieces of words, thoughts, feelings, and relationships being brought together.

And yet in the bringing together of the puzzle pieces there are often pieces of thoughts and feelings that don't always seem to fit.
And there are sometimes no words for what happens in relationships or for the jumbled pieces
And there are sometimes when the words used reflect deeper hidden thoughts and feelings from the past.
And there are sometimes when one's words, thoughts and feelings hurt a relationship in a way not meant to be or not meant to happen.

Suddenly the moment has come and is over in a flash of light.
How does one then pick up the pieces of the puzzle of the relationship again?
How does one deal with the jagged pieces of the feelings and thoughts?
How does one say I am sorry and make peace with the jagged piece of a relationship?

It is painful to write this but must be done.
For I am human and have hurt and been hurt.
Words have been said, feelings provoked, with one I love.
And now the raw jagged piece is there between us.
I confess that from a deeper vulnerable place within, I then reacted in pain, hurt, anger and shame.
I now find from that same place and from that piece of relationship the willingness to say I am sorry and please forgive for I forgive and do love this one I have hurt and who hurt me.

Whether to blog or not to blog,
Me thinks I will blog.


the reverend mommy said...


zorra said...