Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Times that try a mama's soul

Well we finally made it through Zachary's oral surgery. It was quite extensive. But that will hopefully take care of the problems he had been having due to a cavity filled mouth, rotting teeth, etc. Poor guy was pretty upset the night before as big sister described surgery for him. He hates shots. He was really upset and crying Monday morning until they gave him a happy pill. And per Dr. Madusa's prediction, it wasn't long before he was up and playing. I realized he had probably not had anyone with him through his previous surgeries in China, and maybe not much comfort. So I was going to be sure he was comforted. And man was he hungry. Thank you to all who prayed for him and us.

We got some good care at the hospital also, as did Zach. I wonder if it had been an adult would it have been as caring? He came home with all kinds of things that they gave him. I think they would have taken him home too if they could have. All of them said how good he was. And he is a good kid.

We are going through the transition of Bob working on the weekends from 12am to 12pm. Kara has regressed back to some of her acting out, thoughtlessness, lack of safety, you name it. And the other two are having some emotional upheaval as well. I am trying to do the best I can do as Mom, but weekends are full for me too. And Sunday is a killer of a day. Friday they were out of school and because of Bob working, I was the one running them around. We had to do Zach's preop and see his pediatrician. Got all three of them their Flu shots, probably could have avoided it, but we were there and they were giving them. All three screamed and hollered and fought me. But gave them ice cream to make up for it.

Took them to the public park to play later that day. #1 rule is they are to stay together, and play where I can see them. What did Kara do, run off away from the group and where I couldn't see her. Maybe I watch too many CSIs, Court TV, Cold Case, Without a Trace, and NYPD, but I have a thing about watching the kids especially in public. Several times I lost site of her, and several times I had to catch her, make her sit out and retell her the rules. And she would do her sullen pouting act and I hate you act toward me. I was never so glad than when we left the park.

Sunday after church we go to get something to eat before we go to WalMart to get what we forgot on Saturday. I let them choose McDonald's. Boy did I goof up. They are usually pretty good there, but not this time. They would not come when I called them, they kept playing. They wouldn't eat their food. Finally I said that's enough we are leaving. They did the Oh mom thing. Didn't work we left. We went to WalMart to get somethings for Katy's school project. We get out of the car, and I am getting Zach out of the child seat, I hate the seatbelts in those things. While I am doing that Kara just walks out into the middle of the lane and here comes a car. Fortunately Katy yells at her to get back. I give her another talking to about safety, and make her hold my hand to the store, in the store and out of the store. She gave me that sullen pouting I hate you act.

Most of that weekend she is acting out, and then doing her pouting, sullen I hate you to me.
By the time I get to bed on Sunday, I am exhausted.
It is the times that try a mama's soul.


Psalmist said...

Oh, poor dear! You know what I was thinking as I read your description of the children's acting out? Gosh, that must be a nutshell version of how we act with God. Think of how much invaluable teaching you're giving your children into the nature of God: no matter how they act up & act out, you're still their mama and you love them. Same with God and us.

Just a thought.

I hadn't read about Zach's surgery, but I'm praying for a complete recovery...and your sanity!

the reverend mommy said...


I got a leash. She got the message. It was Chick-Fil-A. At first she thought it was funny and went around barking like a dog. She finally got the message that as soon as she stopped running off, I would take the leash off.

This too will pass. It just won't seem to pass very fast. They will adapt, but it's going to take time.

The Vicar of Hogsmeade said...

What a weekend!

Hang in there with the rules. Giving your kids boundaries helps them know they are safe because you, the grownup, are in charge.

net said...

Wouldn't it be nice if kids came responsible, nice, caring, supportive, easy and 18 years of age?

Blessings, dear friend! Praying lots for you!

Mary Beth said...

Good on you, Abi. The leash is a great idea. Actions have consequences, etc.

Hang in there, dear friend.

Mary Beth said...

Hey, Net -

Is 18 really the magic age?

If so, I only have 6 months to go...and HIMSELF has a long way toward being "responsible, nice, caring, supportive, easy."

Maybe you could send some magic juju my way?

Anonymous said...

Sigh... I remember all too well. I'm not a big fan of leashes myself, but I am of consequences. Rules explained once, reminded once, third time we leave.

There was a word association from Zig Ziglar that helped me too - HALT
H (hungry)
A (angry)
L (lonely)
T (tired)

Usually if I had one or more of those words as a reality, it was time to HALT we needed to just GO HOME. And many times, the person who was the hungriest/angriest/loneliest/tiredest (is that a word???) was ME!!!

whose big kid problems seem harder, but aren't really...

Anonymous said...

P.S. I love Psalmist's take on it too... What a GREAT thought! I am sure I needed a time out chat with Him more than once over the last few weeks!