This morning, I went for my mammogram. It was not as painful as some I have had. I was not going into the office yet, because I was going to Zach's preschool for a Thanksgiving Feast. Well, as it turned out, I had some time on my hand. Imagine that time on my hand, boy its been awhile. What to do? I had my laptop with me so I thought about going to the library and working on my sermon, or bloggin or surfing. But that didn't appeal to me. The mall and other stores were just moments away. So I went to the new Kohl's store to look at the New Balance walking shoes they had on sale. I ended up looking at everything they had. But I didn't buy anything, I had to remind myself we have no extra money for these things. I decided my old shoes would do, until we begin getting Bob's paycheck, and get some of our bills and debt paid down. (Remember, I am walking now.)
So I left Kohl's and went to Books A Million to look for a book that had been suggested for me to read, "Writing Down the Bones". But they didn't have the book, so I kept looking at the various books in categories I like to read. I saw quiet a few, I would like to have, but again I reminded myself, we just don't have the extra money, and I got books I haven't finished yet. Book stores can be dangerous to my pocket book, just ask my husband. But as I was browsing, picking up books and reading them, I began to experience some sensations. I began to feel relaxed, a sense of being taken away, a sense of going inward, deeper within, centering, a peace coming over me. A thought came to me, that recently I had a reoccuring thought, "Deep calls to Deep". I had not known what that was about, and yet here I began to experience my depth getting in touch with the depth of the other, God. I began to experience the deep. I allowed myself just to experience it, just to relish it, to see where it led me inside myself. It seemed like it was a long time, and yet, I had plenty of time to get a cup of coffee, and go to Zach's preschool. After the thanksgiving lunch, I went back to my office and continued the meditative state, the deep breathing, the mindfulness. I realized how much I had missed and needed this, and so journaled about it. God's deep had been calling to my deep that was calling to me. I am so glad I had that time today, that quiet, that browsing, that peace. Next time, maybe it won't take so long to get me to answer God's call....or listen to me.
Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me. Psalm 42:7
I will give you the treasures of the deep, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord..." Isaiah 45:3