God's leadership model

From Leading with a Limp by Dan Allender:

Here is God's leadership model: he chooses fools to live foolishly in order to reveal the economy of heaven, which reverses and inverts the wisdom of this world. He calls us to brokenness, not performance; to relationships, not commotion; to grace, not success. It is no wonder that this kind of leadership is neither spoken of nor admired in our business schools or even our seminaries.

Posted by Darryl at DashHouse.com

He also posts this the next day The myth of competence

I was flipping through Bill Hull's latest book last night - Choose the Life: Exploring a Faith that Embraces Discipleship. This quote jumped out at me:

The myth of competence is the idea that we will outgrow our weaknesses, difficult sins, fears, and disappointments. We will reach a place of spiritual competence where we have it together. It's a myth because that time never comes; in fact our dependence on God grows as we become more like Jesus. Brokenness is living life in the light of that reality.

More to come from this book. Free resources on the book are available here. Thanks to Naomi for recommending this book.

I quote these because I am tired of the business model of church, as if that is the way to do it. I am tired of being made to feel incompetent, because I don't lead that way. And I am sick and tired of having it slammed down my throat. I am just not sure this is the way Jesus wants us to go or he lead. Yes, we are to lead with excellence. I think sometimes it is my sins of ommission that are more costly in leadership than my sins of commision. Dan Allender has written some very fine books. I met the man at a Pastoral Counseling conference, he is a man of integrity. I will be buying this book and reading it.

And as far as Darryl's post on Spiritual competence I give you what John Wesley wrote;

John Wesley wrote: "The process of sanctification, or Christian perfection, begins when we are justified, made right with God. The process of perfection lasts a lifetime, cleansing away all sin with God’s gradual work on the soul. For most people, perfection comes at death. For Wesley, the scriptures were clear: God can and will forgive sin and cleanse us. The love of God can grow in our souls such that we are able to love completely, loving God and one another. Although it is possible to be perfected in love, it is not possible to be without errors, which flow from our human imperfect logic. “It is as natural for a human being to mistake as to breathe,” Wesley explained.(p.56) It is also possible to be tempted, and even stray from that perfect love. At all stages of spiritual growth, even perfection, it is possible to “grieve the Holy Spirit of God” (Eph 4:30), so we always need Christ, to give us grace, atone for our mistakes, to be the root of our spiritual growth. John Wesley explains that if, in fact, all things are possible for God, then how can anyone refuse to accept the possibility of being made perfect through Christ’s grace? In other words, what have you got to lose by believing that perfection is possible? “Let not those who are alive to God oppose dedicating all our life to God.” Click this link if you want to know about John Wesley:Holiness of Heart and Life, An Invitation to Spiritual Growth,

A thought for the day from St. Teresa of Avila

"Accustom yourself continually to make many acts of love, for they enkindle and melt the soul."

Saint Teresa of Avila
Spanish ascetic, nun, & saint (1515 - 1582)

A little more about St. Teresa of Avila; Spanish ascetic, mystic, Carmelite nun, & saint; co-founded reformed Carmelite order; patron saint of Spain. Want to know even more, here is a detailed biography of her.

Want one of her books or a book about her; here's the list at Amazon.com

A Comedy of errors

It all began rather pleasantly, nothing out of the ordinary. The church was having a picinic at one of the member's lakehouse. It was a beautiful drive out to the place. We took our boat and put it in the water at the community boat ramp. No problem there.
Road the boat across the lake over to the lake house. Beautiful setting. Had a good time being with the members, sitting by the lake, talking and then eating. Great food. After we ate, which inlcuded homemade ice cream,(yum yum) we had a devotional, I mean I led a devotional. Thanks to the revgalblogpals, I did one on the fruits of the spirit. Then the trouble began.
We went to take people for a boat ride, and the engine wouldn't start. Thought at first it was the battery. But no it was not the battery. Thought it was the battery cable, but not it was not. Turns out it was the starter, so no boat ride. But wait what to do with the boat? We are across the lake from the trailer, and the boat ramp. Well all the men stood around, and then they got an idea. Uh oh is this dangerous or what? Apparently at one time the family used to put their boat in right there by the dock and there was gravel there for launching your boat. So their idea is that someone will take Bob to get the trailer and put the boat on the trailer. (Now don't get ahead of yourself, but you are probably right). Bob comes back with trailer which he backs up into the lake onto what is suppose to be gravel. The men push the boat over toward the trailer and onto the trailer. Some of them are in the water now. They get the boat on the trailer, can't get it all the way on, so Bob backs up a little further. Yes, you guessed it, the car is now stuck.
So men gather together again to figure out what to do, and have another brillant idea. They'll hook some chains to the front of the car, and to the back of one of the trucks and they'll pull the boat and car out of the water. So Bob hooks up the chain to where he thinks you are suppose to do it, like a wrecker would do. Only...only...he didn't, he has hooked it to something that breaks when they pull the car. And oh the car and boat are still stuck. They think it is the oil pan, but the guy who is a engine genius and figured out the starter problem, figures out it is instead the transmission fluid line. Which is worse? But it means, the car is going no where and we need a tow truck and ride home. But then we decide to do the tow truck the next day because it is getting really late. Luckily, they had brought the church van so we had a ride back.
Poor Bob is in agony over the whole thing, and feels like an absolute failure. He is kicking himself all over the place. I say to him, you know Bob we are alive, we had a good time, we are all together, its okay. Its fixable. I'll work out. How many times have I done something wrong or made a booboo.(Don't go there.)
So today we go back to the lake house with the tow truck. He pulls the car, the boat up out of the water. We unhook the boat, so he can transport the van to get repaired. It was a beautiful drive out there and back. Zach had a good time being with mommy and daddy. It will all work out. But it truly was a comedy of errors. Oh and when the van is fixed we will go back and get the boat. Then depending on how much the car costs, we'll think about fixing the boat motor. Yes, indeed a comedy of errors.

Thanks for the prayers and thoughts

I am deeply touched by all the prayers and thoughts that have been sent our way about Bob's emergency room visit. Wow. And so many of you can relate to this gallbladder thing. He is fine. A bit tired, but fine. I think in some ways it was once again enlightening to what people go through who go to the emergency room.
You see, the job he has applied for, interviewed for, and finalizing a lot of paperwork and other matters for is an emergency room job.

And of course without fail, as a Pastor we are going to spend lots of time with members and their families in the ER.
This week left me tired from the very beginning. But we are fine. No more gallbladder or gas pains for Bob.

Thank you to all for asking, praying, and commenting. You all are the best!!

Friday Five: Bursting with Fruit Flavor

From the RevGalBlogPals Friday Five:

Reverendmother here...
On to the F5:
Well, those of us in the United States are on high alert for air travel. Thank heaven, it appears that a huge disaster has been averted. Meanwhile, dreadful conflicts continue in the Middle East and around the world. We here at RGBP certainly hope and pray for safety, peace and fullness of life for all the peoples of the world.

Galatians 5 describes the fruit of the Spirit. With all the sadness and despair out there, we certainly need it! So, the Friday Five is simple. Pick any five of the following attributes and go wherever the Spirit leads you... your choice! Suggestions: When have you experienced this attribute? When have you struggled with it? Or who embodies it for you?

Or if you're feeling light-hearted--just assign a fruit to each one. I think Generosity is a Banana, don't you?

Love
Joy
Peace
Patience
Kindness
Generosity
Faithfulness
Gentleness
Self-control

As always, let us know if you play.

What a fruit basket turnover we have here for the Friday five. I have even preached a sermon series on the fruits of the spirit. One of the most enjoyable and well received series I have done.

I seem to be in a child like mood today so I went here for Fruits of the Spirit as fruit.
Here is here suggestions: Love is strawberry(fruit of love), joy is pineapple(think of the happy smell), peace is watermelon(piece of... play on words), longsuffering or patience is lemon(have to eat it slowly), gentleness is peach(soft), goodness is banana(child's favorite fruit), (sorry reverend mother), faith is cherry(two together on a stem), meekness or kindness is grapes(good to share), temperance(self-control) is apple(garden of Eden).

This site has symbols for the fruits of the Spirit: Love's symbol is a heart, joy's is an angel, peace's symbol is a dove, patience's symbol is a camel/donkey, kindness' is a gift, goodness' is a star, faithfulness is a rainbow, gentleness is a lamb, self control is a stop sign.

The Emergency Room Visit

Yesterday, Bob started complaining of pains on his left side at about 4 o'clock. He thought it might just be flagelent gas, and would eventually pass. We went for a walk to see if it would help, instead I was the one passing gas. OOps and pepe le pew.
Well, we went home fixed supper and then ate. And he was then in greater pain.
I gave him an order, let's go now to the E. R. and not wait until midnight and then not be able to get a baby-sitter. I got up and called one of the members, but she wasn't home. Called another, see we just moved here and don't know which hospital to go to. He told me which one to take Bob. I said come on lets go. We weren't even through eating. Called the family back and asked if they would watch the kids. His response was, well sure, I thought you were going to ask a while ago. Well, my anxiety is rising, and I am trying to just focus. Drive the kids to their house, I do think to send night-night clothes in case this is a long night. Then made it to the ER. So as we are driving I say to him, has the pain got to where you are throwing up, and of course he throws up. The power of suggestion or I know about pain, yes I do. We did the 2 and1/2 hour wait in the waiting area with all the other interesting people. We got back there and had a nice nurse. It was another 1/2 hour before the Doc came in. I thought Bob was going to go get him, he was in such pain. Doc went back to order pain made nauseau meds. Bob can't take phenegren, he gets delerious with it. Another 1/2 hour and the nurse brought the meds. Bob thought it was higher than a kite with that stuff. It took another 20 minutes before it subsided. Sent him to xray, did the pee in the cup, and took blood. Welll all that it showed was a big bubble of gas. But the Doc didn't rule out Gall Bladder. Gave him some thing to get rid of the gas, and magnesium citrate to yes clean him out. We were told if he had more pain to come back today and they would do an ultra sound. Got to leave about 10:30. Took a while to calm down from all the excitement. Bob slept in the other room so as to not disturb me with all the sounds, smells, etc. Thank God.

So this morning he has no pain. So it could have been just a big ball of gas, or a stone that got in the duct and moved out with the cleaning out. But if its gall Bladder he'll go through this again, only worse. I say just take the thing out.

Now you have to know that we went through the ER thing with Bob when we moved to Wadley. After 3 visits to the ER, and trying to convince the Docs that something was seriously wrong, Bob ended up in the ICU with Guillan Barre. Scary Scary. He had a great Neuro Doc who recognized what was going on, and got him started on the meds right away. Bob never did have his lungs paralyzed like some. But it took quite a while to recover. He told me this time I could not move again if it meant getting sick like that again. M-m-m is Bob's body telling him something or telling me something? Will keep you up to date if we go again. Say some prayers that he stays healthy.

I can only Imagine

My good friend Marty Schwartz sent this to me. Now I don't always follow links, but this one takes you to a video on YouTube called Can http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjPrL3n63yg

Have a look. And then tell me what you think

I think I will stop complaining of my life.

A Day of Celebration

Today St. John UMC has their homecoming, and they are burning the note for the Christian Life Center. This last month they paid off the note. They built it in 1993, with no huge amount of money. They took a risk to "build it and they will come." However it took lots of work to pay off the note, creative fundraisers, and now they have done it. Yea! It is utilized the community for a basketball league, the school for a basketball league. The youth and adults use it. It has striping for volleyball and tennis, which some have played. You walk it inside especially in this heat. They have had other dreams, but lack of leadership or persons to make it happen. My prayer and hope is that we can see those dreams through and many more that God gives us.

Last week I sat with one of the charter members of the church as she recalled the beginnings of this church. What a story of faith, and hope as they began meeting in people's homes, then in a restored garage for worship, finally building the first S. S. rooms. Slowly building as they had the money and ability to do so, including the beautiful sanctuary. Many of the charter members have died. Most of those left are in nursing homes. The woman I sat with is still an active member of the church, only this last year, her health has started to weaken. She has a continued love and care for the church. But sometimes that is what it becomes a love for the church and for that person it means love for God, but it isn't always. And they forget that it is a building used by God to spread his kingdom, to the least and the lost. At one time this church had two services, full sunday school classes, you couldn't find a parking place, a good size youth group, lots of kids. It isn't that way now. And with those losses have come anxiety, fear, insecurity, loss of self esteem, hopelessness, and a lack of focus and vision.

God help us get our focus on you, see your vision and follow you. Help me be the leader you called me to be here for your flock and for your kingdom. Help us to be the church with open doors , open minds, open hearts, and that reaches out to the least the lost, the unloved and the unwanted. We are your servants, Lord.
Speak Lord, for your servant is listening.

revgalblogpals Friday Five: Broadway

This week we have a treat: a guest Friday Five composed by NotShyChiRev. Enjoy!
1. Describe the last play or musical you saw. (At least provide the what, when, where, and why). What was your opinion of it? Okay, I'll play, but I am trying to remember when the last time I saw a play or musical. The last one I saw was Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. It was free, a church member, who was one of the actors, paid for the tickets. It is a Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice colloboration of a lively interpretation of the biblical story of Jacob and his twelve sons. Joseph, his father's favorite, is sold into slavery by his jealous brothers, who tell Jacob that he is dead. The play follows Joseph's travels throughout Egypt, while trying to return to his beloved father. It was also neat to see one of my members who was a Col. in the army be such a good actor in this and other plays.
2. All time favorite play? Musical? Thank you, NotShyChiRev for your broadway questions. My favorite play or musical? Because I haven't seen one in a long time, I don't know. Can't remember. I did like Les Miserables, the Phantom of the Opera, Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. but I guess my all time favorite is Cats.
3. “The Producers,” “The Philadelphia Story,” “Hairspray,” “The Wedding Singer”…all were movies before they were musicals (okay “The Philadelphia Story” was a play and then a movie, and they changed its name when it became a musical, but whatever). What non-musical movie do you think should next get the musical treatment? Now this is one difficult question, mmm, The Pirates of the Carribean or Harry Potter or Narnia or Shrek or Devil wears Prada I don't know.?.
4. Favorite song from a musical? Why?

Andrew Lloyd Webber's timeless hit song, "Memory."

Midnight

Not a sound from the pavement

Has the moon lost her memory

She is smiling alone

In the lamplight

The withered leaves collect at my feet

And the wind begins to moan

Memory

All alone in the moonlight

I can dream of the old days

Life was beautiful then

I remember the time I knew what happiness was

Let the memory live again

Every street lamp seems to beat

A fatalistic warning

Someone mutters and the street lamp sputters

And soon it will be morning

Daylight

I must wait for the sunrise

I must think of a new life

And I mustn't give in

When the dawn comes

Tonight will be a memory too

And a new day will begin

Burnt out ends of smoky days

The stale cold smell of morning

A street lamp dies, another night is over

Another day is dawning

Touch me,

It's so easy to leave me

All alone with the memory

Of my days in the sun

If you touch me,

You'll understand what happiness is

Look, a new day has begun...

Enough Said er Sung
5. The most recent trend in Broadway musical revues is to construct a show around the oeuvre of a particular super-group or composer, where existing songs are woven together with some kind of through story. The most successful of these (“Jersey Boys” (The Four Seasons), “Mamma Mia” (ABBA), “Movin’ Out” (Billy Joel)) have made a mint, but many (“All Shook Up” (Elvis), “Hot Feet” (Earth, Wind and Fire)) have bombed. What great pop/rock singer/composer or super-group should be the next to be featured, and what might the story-line be for such a show? I have to go with Elton John, the King of Rock and Roll. The pride of Atlanta and London, Princess Diana's friend, the best dresser of them all. Candle in the Wind comes from too many Saturday Nights with Pinball Wizard, Bennie and the jets and rock and roll madonna plus the tiny dancer doing the crocodile rock but if you must be a Rocket man on the badside of the moon but come down in time because I need some Philadelphia freedom and don't go breaking my heart because there is a madman across the waters and island girl but the bitch is back instead live the simple life so you can feel the love tonight and don't let the sun go down on me, if you can take me to the pilot where someone saved my life tonight and I need you to turn to so good by yellow brick road I'm still standing and I am tired of singing sad songs rather sing a love song but I guess that's why they call it the blues, blue eyes, but sorry seems to be the hardest word, so turn out the lights when you leave, 60 years on I don't want to go on like that and all this is the circle of life nikita, little jeannie, Daniel and levon, its your song.
Bonus question for singer/actors. Favorite part you’ve ever played/sung.

In the church I served in Columbus, Ga we would do Disney night singing songs from Disney, some solos, some sing a longs, some as a group. Listen we had fun but we also practiced and did a good job. It was one of the well attended fun things that church did. They had me do two solos that year. One from the Hunchback of Notre Dame, "God Help the Out Casts". And then the second song was "Someday my Prince will Come" from Snow White. Just as the song was coming to its end, they had my husband, Bob come out wearing a tee shirt that said something like kiss a frog, get a prince and he was carrying a stuffed animal frog. I could barely finish the song for laughing so hard. I had no idea they were going to do that to me.
As always, let us know in the comments if you play! And standing ovations (as well as more visits, no doubt) for those who link directly to their posts.

Woking at the desk, working through thoughts and feelings.

Here I am at my desk, working on a sermon, thinking about some things, trying to get over a headache, and sleep deprivation. So maybe I am not working, more like vegetating.

Here are some thoughts that have been floating through my head about being here in the Shoals area that I have been wanting to write about, but have not known what to say. This area is a big Church of Christ area. They dominate this area, not the Baptist but the Church of Christ. Do you know what Church of Christ believe in, and hold too?

They don't believe in Women as Preachers or Pastors that's for sure; "In each congregation, which has existed long enough to become fully organized, there is a plurality of elders or presbyters who serve as the governing body. These men are selected by the local congregations on the basis of qualifications set down in the scriptures (1 Timothy 3:1-8). Serving under the elders are deacons, teachers, and evangelists or ministers. " Nope, no women.

You'll find no piano, organ, guitars, keyboard, drums or any other musical instrument in a Church of Christ church; "a return to New Testament Faith and practice - acappella singing is the only music used in the worship. " Nor will you find other forms of worship like "candles, incense, and other similar elements", its not N. T. Can't have contemporary service or Taize or emerging worship there.

They disdain the Protestant and Catholic churches. The Churches of Christ historically do not use the Old Testament to authorize practices, relying solely on the New Testament for matters of practice. They believe that the commands of the Old Testament were to Jews (under Mosaic Law) only and were done away with when Christ died. What no OT?

They believe that only members of the Church of Christ are Christians, the rest of us are going to hell. Well, well, and who made you God?

I have a very good child hood friend who is Church of Christ. I have known about these beliefs and practices for a long time. But the Church of Christ were not in the majority in my hometown or any of the other areas I have lived. But here in Florence, they are. They put a lot of pressure on persons who don't believe the way they do and who are not members of their church. That means they really pressure my members to come to the Church of Christ.
As my members say though, they aren't intersted, they see how these people live their lives outside of church and it is confusing. But can you imagine what pressure they have put on my members that now they have a female pastor? The heat has been turned up as hot as the summer heat wave we are in. My members have been asking what's the best way to deal with some of the things being said to them, what to say? One of my members told a friend of her's this; "now so and so we are just not going to go there. You and I are just going to disagree, and you and are best friends, and I would rather be best friends that get into an argument that is going to ruin our friendship".(That includes playing cards mind you.) So far that has worked for them, but some of the others are really being given a hard time.

This church and I are the big topic of conversation around here.
And we are all going to hell, especially me, according to them.

Egalitarian Marriages Are Happier and Healthier

From CBE comes this word: There is an excellent article on godswordtowomen.org called, “Empirical Data in Support of Egalitarian Marriages and A Fresh Perspective on Submission and Authority,” that reviews many scientific studies that all say that marriages that operate on the basis of equality are much more healthy than those that are hierarchical — in fact that hierarchical approaches actually harm marriages.

Over the last 50 years these studies reveal that significant numbers of egalitarian marriages are happy in comparison to traditional hierarchical marriages. A recent study quantified these results revealing that over 80% of egalitarian marriages are happy while less than 20% of traditional marriages can say the same. That represents over a 4:1 ratio in favor of egalitarian marriages. Spousal abuse continues to be more than 300 percent higher in traditional marriages than in egalitarian marriages.
These research studies accomplish the following: First, they effectively discredit any traditionalists’ notion that dismantling hierarchy destabilizes marriage and that the root problem in marriage is the unwillingness of each spouse to accept the role for which he or she was designed. Second, they prove that hierarchy actually destabilizes and harms marriages. Third, they provide objective data that egalitarian marriages produce the healthiest, happiest, most intimate, and stable of all marriage relationships with the least amount of spousal abuse. (You can go to the article to read the whole post). It is well worth reading.

The Church of the Girly-Man, Ya!

I have been debating with myself whether or not to blog about this. But I finally made my mind up to blog.

David Warnock in his blog 42 writes this :
I don't get it: JOLLYBLOGGER: The Church of the Girly-Man, Ya!.
It seems to me that there is a thing going on that starts with a goal (attracting American men to Church) and then interprets scripture to support it. In my own naive way it seems that trying to create a gospel that appeals to a particular group in society is getting things backwards.
Neither the churches that Jollyblogger criticizes, nor some kind of male authority/testosterone based cult sound very like the sort of churches based on the gospel that I find in scripture. Lets get real about Jesus, this is no way to do it.

I am not surprised that the JollyBlogger's David Wayne would have a major post on what is being called "The Feminization of the church" coming from David Murrow's book Why Men Hate Going to Church. He has referenced several other blogs which have also addressed this issue from the side of feminization of the church and girly-churches. Sean Michael Lucas wrote this : As women transitioned from leadership of mission's organizations and "women of the church" groups to the leadership of congregations, this is viewed as part of the reason why American men have stopped going to church, why mainline Protestants have lost members in droves, and why the church is in crisis today. The answer, according to these recent books and conservative evangelical leaders, is to "re-masculize" the church, freeing men and their sons to embrace their manhood (by drinking, smoking, risk-taking, and other behaviors in smaller male-oriented groupings or by exercising "male headship" in various leadership roles in family, church, work, etc.).

Anthony Bradley has this to say on his blog: Believe it or or not, decor makes a difference. Many sanctuaries are painted a soft pink, eggshell white, or lavender, with cushiony pews and neutral carpet. The altar features fresh flowers while the walls are adorned with quilts or felt banners. Honestly, how do we expect men to connect with a masculine God in a space that feels so feminine? (pg. 190)
Flowers, soft pink, wall quilts. I laughed OUT loud when I read that. I guess for Murrow some churches look like the sets of Martha Stewart's or Oprah Winfrey's show. Hmm, churches with better (gender blended) aesthetics that fit the image of a masculine God can been found in old-school Methodist, Episcopal, Lutheran, and Presbyterian Churches(ever been to 10th Pres. in Philly--awesome!!), and so on.Fellas, thoughts? Does your church's pink walls, etc. bother you? Should it? Should a guy walk into a church and say to his friend, "wow, dude, this is so pretty?"

Well I can put up with those thoughts for awhile because I know from whence they come. I was a little surprised to see this though at the UMC. org under resources, Real Men Don't Worship by Dean Mcintyre. The year 2006 is the 50th anniversary year of full ordination rights for women in The United Methodist Church. There have been new hymns, liturgies and prayers, worship services, books and articles, and grand and glorious gatherings in recognition and celebration… as there should be. Everyone celebrates the righting of past wrongs. Should we also be concerned with what is happening in the church with the disappearing men? In looking at some of the reasons mentioned above, we may be tempted to ask if it is right and just for men to feel that way. But we must get beyond that question and recognize the simple fact that many men DO feel that way and we must ask, "What shall we do about it?"
Questions about hymns and hymn singing:
Does this mean we should avoid singing "I Need Thee Every Hour" and "As the Deer" (The Faith We Sing, no. 2025)?
Should we sing more of "Rise Up, O Men of God," "Onward Christian Soldiers," "Lead On, O King Eternal," and "The Battle Hymn of the Republic"?
Which is better for the language of hymns: getting rid of male pronouns for God or using BOTH male and female pronouns for God?
Do men enjoy singing less than women? Is it socially more acceptable for women to sing than men? Has our culture trained men to disdain singing?
Do people respond differently according to the gender of those who lead music in worship? or those who preach the sermon? or those who lead committees?

Its a good article, asking some good questions. Here are some of the statistics of today's testosterone-deficient churches:
Ninety percent of American men believe in God, and five out of six claim to be Christian (according to Barna Research Group), but only two out of six attend church.
One out of three attendees are men; two out of three are women. This is the case in 70 percent of United Methodist churches, 55 percent of Baptist churches, and 25 percent of nondenominational churches.
One-fourth of married women attend church without their husbands.
Lack of men in church is a predictor of church decline.

I don't know why but the whole thing bothers me. I have the book Why Men Hate Going to church and have read it. I was left wondering about the accuracy of his research behind his statistics, and reasons for why men don't go to church. But I was also bothered by how he really put the blame on women, and on women clergy in particular. I just don't think you can do that if you don't have some studies to back you up. And I think those who are borrowing his book's ideas to back their reason for why women shouldn't be clergy, and why men are to be the head of the house, need to be very careful. I really believe that the church needs to be in ministry to all people.

And I am concerned that young men in particular seem to be leaving the church. When I got to St. John, what I learned was that it wasn't just the young men, it was the young women too. They had a good youth program, but once you were finished with youth you were out of there, and there wasn't anything else there for you. And so many of the young people went to other churches that did offer a young adult program. Now mind you there is a college in Florence, with a good population of students. Alot of the young adults from this church went there. Okay so you got young adults, college students, but no program. Uh I think I see the answer here. Hopefully one of the things we can get started here and grow is a young adult group. I pray for the one's that we can reach out to, and involve, and help find Jesus in their lives.

The Vicar's Study

I just had to wonder when did he visit my office and draw the cartoon. Anybody that knows me and my office will know it looks an awful lot like this. Taken from Church Times. But it was drawn by the wonderful cartoonist Dave Walker at CartoonChurch.com

Now if I can just find my sermon for Sunday, and the report for my District Superintendent, and the notes for the Administrative Council meeting....

cheesecake Bob

Okay Rhiannon asked for a cheesecake picture of my hubby Bob. See the post on the Friday Five about the bonus question.
So here is a cheesecake photo of Bob and cheesecake photo of boy, Zach, as a bonus. Not sure which one is the cheesiest, but the tall dark and handsome guy stole my heart long time ago.

Welcome to MDA's Official On-Line Application

Welcome to MDA's Official On-Line Application

Help, I am being put in Jail, the slammer, Lock-Up for MDA. Help, I have to raise my own Bail money to get out of the jail. So please, please won't you help my by clicking the MDA official on-line application and donating a few dollars to the MDA for my bail money. I have to raise $2600 to get out. I have to raise the money by August 17th. If you are not comfortable with the online stuff just let me know via email revabi@yahoo.com what you are willing to donate, and we'll collect later.

If you want to learn more about Muscular Dystrophy you can go here:

And yes this is for Jerry's Kids. But it is also for all those who suffer from the other 43 and more diseases. Bob and I have friends who have suffered from Myasthenia Gravis and other muscular diseases.
So yes I am going into lockup shamelessly to raise money for MDA. Besides some of the best Christians I know were in lockup once.

RevGalBlogPals: hot hot hot friday five

RevGalBlogPals: hot hot hot friday five

Many areas of the United States are having a heat wave. Global warming, anyone? Look on the bright side of melting glaciers and enviro-destruction by taking a crack at the Friday Five:
1. What's the high temperature today where you are? 93 is the predicted temperature with storms coming.
2. Favorite way(s) to beat the heat. Swimming in the lake, pool, or ocean, but mostly staying inside with the air conditioner and reading a good book.
3. "It's not the heat, it's the humidity." Evaluate this statement. This is a Southern saying and it is the truth, you can be hot, but the humidity will drag you down, ruin a haristyle, make clothes go limp, makeup run, make you tired and worn out, nothing will dry, and thus it makes the heat feel worse than it is. Football teams from areas that are not use to the humidity will just be wet rags and expereince muscle cramps in the game, and then the local team will win.
4. Discuss one or more of the following: sauna, hot tub, sweat lodge, warm-stone massage. I'll say this it is too hot for any of these right now. I don't like sauna's because I feel like I being smothered. I do like being in a hot tub with my hubby. Will not do a sweat lodge for same reason as sauna. dont' know a thing about warm-stone massage, don't know that i want to. Most often prefer the regular kind of massage, and not the quickie that President Bush did to the Chancellor of Germany at the G-8 conference.
5. Hottest you've ever been in your life I don't think I am hot commodity, but if you are talking about living in heat, working in heat, it was the summer of Junior year of College. I was serving as a Summer Missionary in the Panhandle of Florida, not on the beach though. We would stay in their homes and work in their churches doing vbs, youth, children, whatever they needed us to do. At one of the very small churches, we stayed in a very small travel trailer with no air conditioner, no fan, and no air circulation. I and the other college student got heat exposure. It was one of the hottest summers ever and HUMID. We both thought we would die. In fact neither one of us served as summer missionaries again after that, and prior to that I had served every year. It was a great experience and it was part of how I discovered God had been calling me and preparing me to be a minister.

Non-temperature related bonus: In your opinion... who's hot? I really can't say, I don't get to see movies, I don't get to watch movie videos or listen to music, I don't even get to watch the entertainment news to know. So I would have to say my husband Bob is hot.
As always, let us know if you play--and those of you who are linking directly to your posts? You're hot. And cool.

Alligators, Gators, everywhere

The other night we had supper at Fudpuckers in Destin, Fla. If you have never eaten there, it is one of the touristry places to eat. It is a good hamburger, sandwich place. One of it's attractions is Gator Beach where you can feed the gators, watch the gators while you wait, but don't go swimming with them. "Just attach a piece of specially formulated “gator bait” to a cane pole and lower the food down into the pond!" They also have "Gator Shows" throughout the day.

Seeing all the gators made me think about the gators we have to deal with in life. Alligators are an opportunistic feeder which means they will eat anything that crosses their path if they are hungry. They are people who are like that you know; they will take advantage of, run over, or eat you for lunch. It doesn't matter if you are friend or foe to them. Fortunately, alligators do not see people as a source of food, and you are more likely to get struck by lightening than you are to be eaten by an alligator. However, some people will see you as a source of energy or power or use you. 99% of all alligator attacks are provoked. By feeding an alligator in the wild you are actually provoking an attack. Alligators can associate humans with food and people may be attacked because someone else has fed the alligator.

Seeing the gators lying around in the sun made me think of the gators in the church as well. Sometimes there are people in churches like the gators waiting for the preacher to make one mistake, say one thing wrong, forget something or somebody, and they are ready to eat the preacher alive. Now not all church members are like that though, thank God. They too look for an opportunity to strike usually to bring uproar and dissonance to a church. They are not looking for harmony. They are looking for "gator bait", which might be an unsuspecting new member or new Christian as well as a staff member.

I grew up in Florida on the lakes around Avon Park and Sebring, Florida. There were plenty of gators around, and my parents were very protective of us. Finally they moved into town away from the lakes. But we still swam in them. I have even seen them come up on land into people's fish ponds. I remember being fascinated by them and yet keeping my distance.

Here is some SAFETY INFORMATION about gators

• Don't feed alligators. This is a most important rule. Providing food for these wild animals not only makes them bolder and encourages them to seek out people.
• Keep your distance. Although they may look slow and awkward, these animals are extremely powerful and can move with a startling burst of speed on land over short distances. A safe distance from an adult alligator is about 60 feet.
  
• Never disturb nests or small alligators. Some female alligators protect their young and may become aggressive if provoked. A baby alligator should never be captured, even if the mother is not visible. She may be watching you and decide to take action to protect her baby.
  
• Keep your pets and children away from alligators. Large alligators do not recognize the difference between domestic pets and wild food sources. When they are hungry, alligators act on their hunting instinct and might attempt to feed on your house pet if given the opportunity.
  
• Don't swim in areas that are known alligator habitats. Always be careful around water. Splashing can attract alligators that think a prey animal is injured. They may act on instinct and attack. Or, a protective female may believe her young or eggs are threatened and take defensive action. Be cautious when fishing in waters with alligators, as some will not hestitate to grab a hooked fish or eat the fish on a stringer.

Having read those makes me think of some the suggestions that Peter Steinke has in his books on systems dynamics of churches. Be a non-anxious presence. Don't get triangulated. Be direct and honest. Don't keep secrets. Keep your own boundaries clear so you can be self differentiated. Be aware of emotional cutoffs. There's more, and maybe you have learned a few in life or Pastoring you would be willing to share. Just add your comment.

God on the beach

I wish I had a picture to show you. But then I am not sure the picture would really capture it. Today I was with my three kids at the beach. I would stand in the water with them while the waves were breaking around us. They were holding onto me and scremaing everytime a wave came. Then there was giggles and laughter when they got knocked down or the wave pulled them a little bit. Then they wanted to dig in the sand and make sand castles. I sat in the beach chair watching them from not far away. More giggles and laughter. Zachary would dig up the sand and put it in his bucket, smooth it over and then dump it out. He was most intense, yet happy as he did this. Katy and Kara were scooping up sand and water then throwing it out. After awhile they gave up on that and were laying down in the water as the waves came at them. More giggles and laughter.

As I sat there, and even as I write this, I am tearing up and crying tears of joy that I am so blessed with these wonderful children and such a wonderful moment. I rejoice to see them having a good time, laughing and being happy. It is a good moment that I want to cherish. I see the beauty and differences in each one them, how God has made them unique individuals. I thank God for the blessing and for these children. For the time on the beach with them, and for time on the beach with God.
Yes God is on the beach, but God is in the home too.

Hi God, it isn't "From a Distance.." or "What if God was one of us?" You are here, you are close you are one of us. Help me not miss you okay.

Some bits of wisdom for the pastor

I found a wonderful website called Pastor Hacks, by Bobby Hyatt. It is a lot like Life Hacks, 43Folders and Parent Hacks.

The idea is to increase your productivity as a Pastor, to help you understand new technology and how to use it. He also uses as a resource one of my favorite books of recent, and one that I have been using David Allen's Getting Things Done. He also quotes from George McDonald's book "Ordering Your Private World" like this one: "If my private world is in order, it is because I have begun to seal the "time leaks" and allocate my productive hours in light of my capabilities, my limits, and my priorities." and this one; "If my private world is in order, it will be because I have made a daily determination to see time as God's gift and worthy of careful investment." He titles those "memo to the disorganized." I am that disorganized person. He also has quite a bit on using the IPod.

So Pastors get yourself to the website to learn all you can to be able to become more productive.

It's Raining

Oh my it's raining here.
What a beautiful site to see.
It's also, lightening and thundering so
no going out to play in it and feel it on your face.
But thank God it is raining!

If you look for me today at my blog
I won't be here. I'll most likely be blogging
over at revgalblogpals Saturday Party.
And if you call or come by the house, I won't be here either.
I'll be at my office finalizing my sermon.
(Wrote a bit of a rough draft yesterday.)