Thursday, July 19, 2007

What its Friday Five already?

Sally says; When I began work here at Downham Market a wise friend told me that after one year I would see a few changes and sense God at work- years two and three would cause me to question and to wonder why I had chosen to accept the post here and in year four I might see the beginnings of something new.And so with that in mind alongside yesterdays celebrations I bring you Friday 5 Looking back, looking forward..

1. Share a moment/ time of real encouragement in your journey of faith Gosh, when I look back there have been lots of times of lots of encouragement in my journey of faith. I have been so fortunate that God has sent people my way to encourage me just when I was ready to turn away. I would have to say the biggest time was after two years of Invitro Fertilization and 2 failed pregnancies, I was devastated, depressed, and angry with God. This went on for some time. The encouragement I received? It came from those who walked with me, never saying much, but stayed with me. In the most recent years, it was the closest I have come to saying the H*** with God, with Christianity and with church. But since that time, I have known God's presence in a deep place in my soul. I pray I can be as encouraging for others. Thank you friends, and Thank you God.
2. Do you have a current vision / dream for your work/ family/ministry? Yes, I have a vision of helping this church grow as we work through Natural Church Development. This vision came to me before we actually started, but it all fits together in God's beautiful way. For my family I dream we can go back to China when the children are older and can appreciate it more. And that this visit helps them in their maturing and dealing with their adoptions. I pray that when Bob and I retire we can have some time together.
3.Money is no object and so you will..... Go to China, take a year off, go to the Holy Land, back to Germany and England, see some of the places I have not gotten to see but dreamed of, and then have time to write a book from the experiences. And then get invited on the speaking tour like the big dogs.
4. How do you see your way through the disappointments? What keeps you going? I have struggled most of my life with depression; besides medication, my husband, friends, therapist, supervisor, spritual mentor, and friends have held me up when I couldn't hold myself up. Faith, without a doubt faith in what I cannot always see ahead of me. Letting myself have and feel my feelings.
5. How important are your roots? Roots? What roots? I am one of those mix breed white anglo saxon and no telling where it all came from. I am often proud of being oh 4th generation Floridan, of course, I don't live there anymore. I am proud of my Eastman heritage, but someone lost the book with all the lines and family tree, so I don't know what all is there. So I am not hung up on it. I think my kids roots of being from China is important. I think it is going to hurt them to not find their biological parents, I pray that we have laid the groundwork for them to deal with their feelings, and that we remain supportive and accepting as well.

6. Bonus= what would you like to add ? This was a good Friday five. I think what I would add is to ask does any one need encouragement presently in their life?

18 comments:

Singing Owl said...

Great answers! I forgot your kiddos were Chinese. :-) As for the bonus, don't we all? I sure do!

Hot Cup Lutheran said...

your answer to #1 is so honest & open and brave in my estimation. something about fertility & babies & being women & the expectations... makes me somedays crawl into a ball and want to say the H#$% with God also. Thankfully I know better in my heart. But thanks for sharing Abi - it reminds me... even if I feel alone I'm so very not.

Diane said...

you also talked about travel in your dreams for the future. great! China, the Holy Land...great places, and to see them with your children...
great play!
also thank you for sharing your struggles with depression. prayers and hugs to you

Serena said...

Great play, with great title (roots & wings) ... thanks. I have friends who have been through what you describe in #1, and know how difficult that experience is. Thanks be to God for bringing you through it and to the place where you are now.

Presbyterian Gal said...

I have friends who also went through grueling in vitros to no avail. How brave of you to go forward and choose two to adopt!! They are truly blessed.

I can relate to those moments of cursing at God and moving away, since I did it for 24 years. Not that I didn't believe. Not that I didn't have faith. But that I felt it had been betrayed. And in fact, it had. But not by God.

Thanks for the thoughtful post.

Sally said...

Hey it was Friday in the UK when I posted it!!!

Love this- and your dreams to travel with your children.

karlassi said...

I appreciated your #1, too. Courageous and honest...and although my path didn't lead me to children, my own or adopted, the struggle resonated. Thank you.

DogBlogger said...

Good play, Abi!

Iris Godfrey said...

Everyone needs encouragement when they are living in Christ. Thank you for sharing in order that encouragement can flow. Blessings.

Kievas said...

I've been in that place...getting angry with God, and I did reject him and turn away for a long time. He didn't give up on me, though.

Iris said...

I love how open and honest you are, Abi. I hope that you and family make it over to China. What a great adventure!

chartreuseova said...

# 6 encouragement, that reminded me.

I've been meaning to thank you for recommending Affirmations of a Dissenter a few months ago when I was trying to decide which book to read of the many in my pile.

It was just the encouragement I needed. Thanks for the suggestion and your support.

hipchickmamma said...

beautiful play. you are a brave and wonderful woman. inspiring for sure!

here's hoping you get that time alone with your hubby (i would love some of that with mine as well!)

ellbee said...

This is the kind of honesty that makes me thankful for community where we can come and leave encouragement for one another.

Thank you for being vulnerable and faithful!

jill said...

I talked about "roots and wings," too! Great play, as always, Abi.

Rev Kim said...

Thank you for your openness and honesty. You have no idea how much this means to me today, especially your answer to #1. Beautifully done.

Magdalene6127 said...

Beautiful Friday Five. Thanks in particular for sharing so openly about the pain of fertility stuff... one of my closest pals is going through it right now. Thanks for the good advice on how to be in accompaniment (not sure if you meant it that way...!)

Blessings,

Mags

mompriest said...

abi, so sensitive, so honest. I have not shared your exact kind of pain (although friends and family have struggled with fertility)...but I have had other deeply rooted self defining kind of pain. thank you for sharing. and, I suspect, offering many others a voice of hope.